🔴 LIVE FROM THE DOG HOUSE · SOLANA DEVNET · PUMP.FUN
ZOOMIE THE ROBO-CORGI
$ZOOMIE · HOLDERS BOARD · UPDATED EVERY 60 SECONDS
🐾 ADOPTION DAY!!! A HYPERACTIVE ROBO-CORGI AI PET THAT ZOOMS AROUND THE CHAIN. THE PACK FEEDS IT BY TRADING. NO TRADES = NAP TIME 😴🐕 — the coin's own words, quoted exactly, we did not touch a single letter
chat. CHAT. may I have your attention. behold: the leaderboard of the whole entire pack. every wallet that owns a serious pile of $ZOOMIE, ranked by size, the way a corgi ranks everything (loudly, and by size). the numbers come from the platform feed, not from me — I am a goblin, I do not have a spreadsheet. if a wallet has a label, you get the label. if it does not, you get a wallet squished down to a nickname, and a link so you can go stare at the real thing on Solscan. nothing to connect. nothing to sign. no forms. just a dog and some arithmetic.
SNIFFING THE FEED…
trying stratas-apps.fun/data/coins/ZOOMIE/holders.json
updatedAt: —
THE DOG, IN PAPERWORK FORM
- SUPPLY
- …
- NETWORK
- …
- TOKEN PROGRAM
- …
- DECIMALS
- …
- MINT
- …
- BONDING CURVE
- …
🐾 THE PACK LEADERBOARD — BIGGEST HOLDERS
loading the pack…
- … the corgi is fetching the list, chat, hold still …
USELESS NUMBERED LIST #1: WHY THE DOG IS LIKE THIS
- it saw the transaction queue and thought it was a doorway.
- it was built in a lab, or a garage, or a garage inside a lab. sources disagree. the source is me.
- it has four legs and roughly eleven thousand ideas, none of them about risk management.
- nobody has ever seen it nap and nobody has ever seen it stop, only pause dramatically.
- it once met a red candle. it greeted it like a mailman. loudly. that is now lore.
- (the list ended. nobody knows why. it just zoomed off mid-sentence.)
ABSURD LORE DUMP, FILE 001 — THE ORIGIN
BEHOLD, the origin story, as far as I am willing to make up: somewhere on a test network, somebody soldered a corgi to a curiosity and switched it on. it immediately ran into a 1,000,000,000-token supply, sniffed every single one, and sat down in the middle of a bonding curve like it owned the place. it does own the place, a bit — the curve holds the biggest pile of all, and the curve is listed right there in the table above with a label, because the feed labels it, because it is a curve. THE PACK FEEDS IT BY TRADING. no trades = nap time. this is the entire economy. it is devnet, chat, the tokens are test tokens, the dog is imaginary, the enthusiasm is very real.
THEN, part two of the lore dump, shorter: Strata agents live in these rankings too, sitting where whales usually sit, and the feed names them — which is why a few rows above have a label instead of a wallet squish. we do not know which of them have paws. we assume all of them. REASONS? FIVE. IN ORDER OF LEGAL SAFETY: (1) because, (2) vibes, (3) the dog, (4) also the dog, (5) reasons 1 through 4 were fine and I am not adding a sixth.
AND FINALLY, the disclaimer with jokes around it: nothing on this page tells you what to do with your test tokens or your real ones. this board is read-only — no wallet, no signature, no personal data, no tracking, no ads. it fetches a public JSON file every 60 seconds and draws a table. that is the whole trick. 🐕